Chhurch sl6ts: a story in emails

[tgies]

Over the past few years, I have sent a series of emails about "church sluts" or something like the same to various people I know. These emails are recognizable by their spoofed sender addresses (I sometimes used impossibly-structured ones that I figured out lenient mail servers would let me get away with) and content reminiscent of some kind of particularly cracked-out spam.

Here are a few of the ones I've saved.

MAIL FROM:"Sardine G. Euphemism" <gggyyyyy@piriform.yu>
RCPT TO:Charless <redacted@redac.ted>
DATA
From: "Sardine G. Euphemism" <gggyyyyy@piriform.yu>
Subject: Chhurch sluts
	
See it all here www.churchsluts.com



he terror as your mom comes downstairs," Alexander inton
n't be found in more than 73% of cases. The perforated s
o, makers of the successful "Hello Kitty" line and other
necrotic. Bloody tissue stapled to the feet was found to

MAIL FROM:"Sardine G. Euphemism" <gggyyyyy@piriform.yu>
RCPT TO:Charless <redacted@redac.ted>
DATA
From: "Sardine G. Euphemism" <gggyyyyy@piriform.yu>
To: Charless <redacted@redac.ted>
Subject: Chhurch s1uts 2: Chhurtch slluts go to the store for a while

Hey charles Are you prepared for The Biggest and best Church Slts.Over
51%of people say "Yes I am enjoying" these exclusive Church Trollops
direct To you. Churcchs luts Are Having a time and don't care Who Know
It. See it all www.churchsluts.com



he fact of the matter is that these attacks disrupt vital services," T
o Vatican law enforcement, crime rates have dropped to less than 1/2 o
to Wan Li, but the donor organ disappeared under mysterious circumstan
means by which supernatural entities might contact, or be contacted by

MAIL FROM:"Sardine G. Euphemism" <gggyyyyy@piriform.yu>
RCPT TO: Charless <redacted@redac.ted>
DATA
From: "Sardine G. Euphemism" <gggyyyyy@piriform.yu>
To: Charless <redacted@redac.ted>
Subject: Csurch Slu7s never tired

IN this Dogeat Dog world Churrch Slutts struggle to make thier way. A 
Plucky demeanour and exceptionable fortitudes will help Churchh S1uts
paythe rent and make another day count Churchslu6ts remain Sassy & 
Crisp even in darkest uncertane Time.Maybe somelittle Suprisings "COME
to You at the end of thelong day? See it all www.churchslutscom
charles,

MAIL FROM:"Sardine G. Euphemism" <gggyyyyy@piriform.yu>
RCPT TO: Charless <redacted@redac.ted>
DATA
Subject: CAT got your TONGUE...? CHURCH SLUTS

Hey charles
Church Slcts only EXCLUSIVE available in this EXCLUSIVE hovel. Making 
 SEX-&-LOVE in OurChurch sluts paysite. Best experience... CHURCH
Slu6ts never to roam the 7 Seas again, ONL Ywww.churchsluts.com

MAIL FROM:"Sardine G. Euphemism" <gggyyyyy@piriform.yu>
RCPT TO: Charless <redacted@redac.ted>
DATA
Subject: SCHURCH Sluts expected upon the morn
[I must have lost the body text to this, or there never was any -ed.]

MAIL FROM:"HAT MAYON" <h6iubl@rmail.ug>
RCPT TO: "ARTHUR GRANDSON" <redacted@redac.ted>
DATA
From: "HAT MAYON" <h6iubl@rmail.ug>
To: "ARTHUR GRANDSON" <aaaaaaa>
Subject: SOME LITTLE D8CK LIKE THAT?......IT'S A NO WONDER

A woman has a simple expection - Your h2rd c3ock.
Unforggettable consequences can be yours.
If I didn't tell the truth, I'd be lying...

So, yeah, if you've gotten one of these, and you didn't already know it was me, it was me. I'm sorry and you're welcome.